daSlider
daWaterman
Salto El Limón, Dominican Republic by Valeriy Labushkin
“As long as there are sunsets, I’ll always remember you.”
— My ex on New Years (via itslindseyjay)
I’ve been trying my hardest not to let people see the side of me that has casted a shadow over my life this last year. I smile because to be honest, nobody cares and nobody worries and at the end of the day, I fall asleep alone, crying that I have to wake up the next morning. I’ve lost many things that made me who I am, the need to surf, my love for art and lastly my sense of human compassion for everyone around me. But I’ve come to the conclusion that without these thing, without the things I love and the people I care about, I don’t know who I am and consequently, it makes me face the devastating fact that I am nothing without them. Not being able to surf has slowly been taking its toll on me. I’m no longer able to co-exist with the waves and be in my own private oasis because of school. Im back in this small town filled with melancholy strangers with small dreams that will never compare to mine. I’m no longer around family and friends who inspire me to dream big, the soothing waves in LI, the laughter and joy of being in the city. I’m no longer chasing my dreams because personally I’ve been physically, mentally and spiritually exhausted. I’m trying my hardest to be strong, to be friendly, to ultimately be happy but it’s just so hard when nobody is by your side and you’re fighting your demons 1 vs a million. I’m trying my hardest to rebuild myself, to make myself a better Lindsey than I was a year ago, to recover from rock bottom but I can’t. I just wish I had the strength to fight back because I desperately need Lindsey back….. At least for a while.